(Today's post by Marc Cannon)
I have tried multiple times to gain perspective on this portion of scripture. If I’m transparent I have had a hard time with this particular book in the past and today is no different. Job and a close friend Bildad are discussing God’s role in Job’s circumstances. Job has been ravaged. His life is unlike anything I have ever seen. Looses his fortune, his children die and he’s physically covered in sores, opened and scabbed. Those sores are so prevalent that he is unrecognizable.
There is a tension in this book that I’m totally uncomfortable with. I guess because I have lived through pain for a great deal of my life. 15+ years of my life I lived through awful depression, mired in a daily fear of anxiety that made me a paralytic at times, my sores were weight gain and a tension with God that I see in Job.
Job was in such pain, both physically and mentally, that he wished he had never been born. Have you ever had that thought or uttered those words?
“I wish I had never been born”… That isn’t a great place to be. In fact it’s awful.
I have thought and said those very words more than once. For a lot less than what Job is going through here. Similarly to Job, I struggled with a tension with what role God played in the pain in my life. In chapter 8 Job’s friend Bildad accused Job of doing something to bring down some pretty awful punishment from God. In my own life I have played both Job and Bildad. As if the pain I was living in wasn’t bad enough I condemned myself for those things as punishment for “The bad things I’ve done”. This brought an awful lot of tension (On my part) in my relationship with the Lord. Why me Lord? What have I done to deserve this from you? Knowing all along that my poor decisions and giving into sin was the culprit.
When I finally realized that the tension and resentment for the painful things in my life were not punishment from God it allowed me to accept the Love that He so desperately wants to cover me in. When I falter, and I do frequently, and that tension starts to creep back in, I look towards the cross. He reminds me that even when I walk through the trials of Job, His love for me never fails. His role is not in my demise, it’s in my redemption.
My prayer for you today is that each of you understands that even through the trials of life, Jesus’ work on the Cross-is enough!
Are there aspects of your life today where you’re questioning God’s role?